alright....ok....

Fine! Maybe whoever said I needed to change my attitude was right. I did...and well things are looking up. Its hard sometimes to focus on the future when you feel so trapped in your present. Based upon the news of last week....I'm actually surprised that I'm feeling so good. But I somehow just stopped caring about other people's actions. Instead I'm focusing on me. I am graduating in a month! That is so exciting. I've worked so hard on this for 10 years! I'm still in shock that this day is coming....but I know that it is. I bought my cap and gown last week and I even tried it on. It feels so good to have accomplished something. One of the reasons I went back to school was because I felt like I keep having these projects that went unfinished....so I took the biggest project and tackled it. I sort of fill like I may be able to tackle all of the other projects that have been left undone.

I have to admit though that I'm feeling a little tired of relationships. I mean like....romantic relationships. I feel like I have had such rotten luck in them my whole life. Maybe I'm just not cut out to be with someone else. Fine. It will take me some time to accept that...but when I do, I'll be OK. I suppose it could be a lot worse...I could be stuck in some polygamist compound or married to some guy that beat me. So I supposed I'm lucky that I'm single...because lets face it...with the luck I've had in relationships....I'd probably have a horrible marriage too. Being single also allows me to follow my dream. I can pick up and move...because well-its only me. It can be very sad and lonely at times...but that is just life. And I'm about to have a great life.