Booty Call

I just wanted to do a shout out to the girls who got back! I know all my sisters can holla at this one! :) I know its really immature, but seriously.... I couldn't help but take a quick shot to share it all with you. Baby got back!

Clouds in my coffee

What a beautiful day it is! Last Sunday my car kind of exploded.... so all week I've been riding my bike to the train. Its been a nice start to my morning, but the helmet hair is insufferable. I don't like wearing a damn helmet. It is however the law that everyone wear one. I completely agree with this law for children. Their young minds are still developing and trauma to the head can cause permanent damage. But I am an adult... I have a hard head... and I don't like to mess up my hair. My only fear is that one day a car will hit me if I don't wear it and then I'll end up like Stephen Hawking. Does anyone have any ideas about how to not get helmet head in the morning?

Work is going well-but getting completely crazy! I'm interviewing about 5 people per day and I have about 100 more people to hire for Guest Services. I really love my job, but I'm starting to get nervous. Its a seasonal position and after the Open I'm going to have to find a new job. Traditionally they say September is a good month to find a job, but I'm still incredibly nervous about it. We will see what happens. Worse case scenario I may relocate with my Aunt and Uncle in Maryland for a couple of months and then return to prepare for the next Open.

My living situation currently kind of sucks. I have my own space, but I'm supposed to share the kitchen with my roommate and her son. She however doesn't really want me using her kitchen, so I'm confined to my room. I have a microwave, toaster and a small fridge-but no hot plate or stove top. This makes it incredibly difficult to prepare a meal. I only have the use of my bathroom sink, and so I can't really prepare much either. For now I'm dealing with this in hopes of securing a decent job after the Open and moving a little closer to NYC.

So how about Mr. Goslin. I have to admit, I've only once watched John and Kate plus Eight... but after seeing the story of their rocky marriage EVERYWHERE, I couldn't help but get a little caught up in the drama. I'm completely disguisted by his behavior. I don't understand why it is that when couples split up, the Mom ends up having to step it up for the kids, and the Dad is free to frolic with a new younger model. It doesn't seem fair to me. It isn't just celebraties either. I've dated single dads in the past and it seems like they became more of an Uncle to their kids, only seeing them once in a while and rarely spending any holidays with them. I realize that people need love, but come on! If a man is a willing participant in creating the children, why is it so easy for them to walk away? I just don't understand the psychology of it.

Tomorrow John and I are going to the Natural History Museum in NYC and I'm so excited! On Friday on the subway I was reading the posters and one of them was advertising the Natural History Museum, when I saw it I couldn't help but want to go. I didn't mention anything to John, but when he picked me up at the train station he asked me if I wanted to go to the NHM on Sunday. I was so excited I almost screamed. haha It is awesome how is starting to read my mind... and next weekend we are going to Hershey, PA to see Jason Mraz and Dave Matthews perform! I am soooooooooooo excited! I've been looking forward to this concert for months, but because of my car exploding and others unexpected life costs, I didn't think we'd be going. But John bought the tickets and booked the hotel... so DMB here I come!

Confessions of a fat girl

As I sit here at Weight Watchers having weighed in heavier than last week I am feeling so defeated. I need help. I have a disease. My disease is "Fat". Being fat controls my life. It hides who i am. It protects me and it shames me. I wasn't always fat. I started life as a normal little girl. I learned to use food as comfort. Food was love and acceptance. Food took away my fear and food was there to comfort me whenever I needed it.

And now that food is killing me I realize that I've got to overcome this. Being fat is so unlike any other disease. For a smoker that quits they don't need three cigarettes a day to keep living. Alcoholics can promise to never touch alcohol again but food- food can not be forsaken. When you are so fat and and depressed the last thing you want to do is work out. You feel grossed out by what you've become and defeated by the amount of weight you've got to lose. You're ashamed. You don't want anyone to see. So you join Weight Watchers. You try Internet diets. But you are still fat you feel even worse. Because now you can add another thing to the list of the things you've failed at. I think of being thin. I think of jumping off a bridge. But no where in my mind do i want to gain more weight. It is a lonely disease. A lonely life. You can't shop in normal stories so shopping is no longer fun. You can't fit comfortably in the seats on a plane so even travel stops being fun.

I'm depressed and can't imagine it getting any better.I wish I could be on the Biggest Loser. Maybe if I had some help I could learn to change my life. But I need serious help. I am so convinced that being fat is a disease. It is a psychological, physical and mental disease.

Memo to my Fellow Commuters

To My Fellow Commuters:

Hi. I'll make this quick since we are all in a hurry, well some of us are in a hurry. I commute four hours a day. Yes that is two hours in the morning, two hours in the evening. During this time I have witnessed many things that I would like to call to the attention of those I am sharing the trains, subways and boardwalks with.

Personal hygiene is very important. However, I don't want to smell you in the morning. I don't care how good you think that cheap calogne smells... it makes me sick.

Escalators: my Father taught me many years ago that when riding on an escalator if you would like to stand on the moving staircase stand to the right, if you would like to walk up the escalator you should walk up on the left. I have practiced this theory most of my life. I understand there are many foreigners in NYC and some of them drive on the opposite side of the road... but seriously people-if you are not in a hurry stand to the right. Standing on the left in someone's way is completely annoying. In my long commute every minute counts. If someone is in my way and holds me back even a minute, it is possible that I will miss my train and get home even later.

Be courteous of those in the seats in front of you, putting your feet up on the back of the seat or pushing against it disturbs the person in front of you. It disturbs them in the middle of their back. Not very nice.

I think that is all for now. Thank you for reading.

The end.

P.S. I've been asked to report on the books I'm reading. Currently I am reading The Brother's Karamazov. It is a great book, but it is long. I'll tell more about it later. I did however discover something really cool lately. I am one of those people that reads 1-2 books every week. I have the time frankly so that is why I do it. I have never been good at getting books from the library because by the time I get the book turned back in I usually owe more than the book would have cost to buy. So based on that I've been buying all of the books I've been reading. Well in the hopes of saving some money I've been trying to figure out how to cut back on my book budget. Well I just discovered the greatest website www.swaptree.com! It is so cool. Basically you upload any book, cd, movie that you are willing to trade. Then you can trade your books, cd's and movies with other people and they will send you something that you want to read or listen too. It is free to trade through the site, you only pay to ship your book to other members. John just sent off my first two books this morning so I'll let you know when I get the two books I traded for. I'm really excited about this site though.

I also have to put a plug in for True Blood. The new season starts Sunday on HBO and it is one of the best series on right now. My recommendation should tell you something... I usually hate vampire movies/stories. But this series is awesome! It is based on a series by Charlaine Harris called the Sookie Stackhouse Series. Not only do I recommend True Blood, I highly recommend reading this series. I never read or watched Twilight, but I think anyone that was in to that would like True Blood. The thing you should know about True Blood is that it does get kind of sexy and may not be appropriate for a younger reader, but all of the adults will love it!

Get away from me you Christian Street Preacher! AHHH!

Ok... so it is very ironic to me that I should spend most of my life growing up in SLC, which is known as a very "religious" place and yet I can count on maybe 2 fingers the times that I've been preached at from a street corner. If my memory serves me correctly both of those times were during the 2002 Winter Olympics. One of those times was actually pretty funny. I remember that during the Olympics there were all these "Christians" who came to SLC to warn the world about the dangers of the Mormon church. Why they felt it necessary to do this... is beyond me. Growing up I considered myself a "Christian". My parents taught me that a "Christian" was anyone who believed in Christ and lived the way he taught. Anyway... back to the story.

So on a cold winter's day in the middle of downtown SLC I was yelled at by some "Christian". I stopped this time particularly annoyed. I decided to have a conversation with this guy. I politely asked him what he was doing. He started going on a diatribe of the horrors of the Mormon church. After listening to him for a minute... I stated that I thought he would be a lot more effective if instead of bashing the Mormons, he instead told people the great things his "church" had to to offer. I could see that I'd caught him off guard because he didn't really know what to say. After a long pause... he was back at bashing the Mormon church again. I decided I wasn't going to win his fight so I said... well it is very interesting what you have to say, let me take some of your papers to my friends and family. The man handed me a stack of about 10 papers. I walked down the street a ways and threw them in the garbage. That move made me laugh a little. I have never understood people who only know how to bash... and don't take the time or effort to inform others of their belief, but instead bash those with a strong belief in something.

I find it ironic that now in NYC I am met with annoying, loud-mouth Christians on a daily basis. My boss is one of those "Christians" and has taken it upon himself to "save me". It has gotten to an almost unbearable thing. I don't feel the need to be saved, nor do I think it has anything to do with him. I would complain to HR... but my boss is HR! The other ironic part of it is that my co-worker is a Catholic. My boss bashes Mormons and Catholics... and my co-worker is so eager to please that I get stuck defending the Mormon and Catholic chruches! I get so annoyed with being preached at that I want to push all street preachers down! I know that is extreme but seriously! I once was forced to listen some guy ranting and raving about Jesus on the subway because he decided that was a good place to recite everything he knew about Jesus loud enough for the whole train to hear.

I just can't take it anymore. I love Jesus... I love God. But hey.... I don't really think its appropriate or necessary for me to stand on the corner in everyone's way screaming that they are going to hell if they don't believe in Jesus. Honestly I think the people that are standing on those corners may have a better place in hell than I do because hey... they are holding those damn annoying signs and shouting-I'm 100% positive that hell will be full of that.

Tales from the Commute

Well...well...well. I have had the pleasure of my commute to Queens for about a month now. It is one of the longest parts of my day. All in all I spend about 4 hrs and 40 minutes a day on public transportation. I feel as if I'm somehow becoming an expert at this commuting business. So I decided that I'm going to try and write more about my experiences because believe me... I see some very entertaining things!

To start with I'll share with you my morning commute. I'm going to leave some details out because I don't really want a scary person to read this and know my every move.

I start my day out at 5:30 a.m. For my readers in Utah... that is 3:30! Yep... about the time you're getting home from your wild night at the club... I'm waking up. This is probably the hardest part for me because I really have a hard time getting to bed before midnight. You do the math. Now depending on my ability to get my butt out of bed depends on my transportation to the train station. A couple months ago my fabulous boyfriend bought me an adorable little bike. I love my bike so much! It is a beautiful red and white vintage style Schwinn cruiser. On mornings where I'm ready to leave the house early I am able to ride my bike to the train station. But lets be honest... now that the excitement of my job has worn off a little... I'm staying longer and longer in bed and am barely pulling in to the station before the train takes off!

I have the first part of my commute down pact. I know exactly where I need to stand in order to be right at the entrance to the train. This fact always makes me smile. I can't help but watch the other commuters with a little social curiosity. Most of them run to the front of the train in hopes of getting a seat. I wait near the back and walk on easily. Its funny how years of "running to the front cause no one is there" has trained everyone to go to the front and to leave the rest of the train almost empty. I don't plan on telling them this any time soon.

Once arriving at Secaucus (yes it is pronounced SEA-COCK-US) I'll wait for the laugh... ok anyway... this is where it starts to get really funny for me. At the Secaucus station (still laughing?) there tends to be this huge blob of people all fighting their way to get on this escalator. However, I made a discovery within the first week that if I stray from the crowd... I have my own private escalator just around a corner from the blob. In fact.. the blob watches me go down the escalator but because they are very silly... they don't realize that they can save themselves from the blob by joining me on my private escalator. This makes me laugh every day. I have this funny feeling like I've outsmarted all of the blob. It is a great start to my day.

It never ceases to amaze me how rude people will be on public transportation. People spread out and occupy three seats just because they don't want anyone to sit by them. As you can imagine the train going in to NYC is quite full... so I am forced to push my way on to the train and almost demand that someone move their bag off of a seat so that I may sit. This train is quick in to Penn Station.

From Penn I begin my subway fun. The subway is an incredible source of entertainment. I have seen things such as 8' tall Asians... cross dressing men, a woman with a huge doll in a stroller and a half naked homeless man with his bum sticking out. Luckily I'm able to drowned out the ranting "Christians" and the lunatics with the sweet music of my ipod, but I can't cover the smell or do anything about the insanity in front of me. I take my ride all the way out to Queens.

The ride to Queens is very ethnic. I'm usually the only white woman on the train and I am able to get a glimpse at what it would be like to visit China, India and Mexico. Hopefully on my way to Queens I don't contract the Swine flu... but if I do you'll understand why.

All in all I don't mind my commute. I've been able to read about 2 books a week and really get to listen to my ipod. I'm definitely amused with the commute thus far and I plan on making more posts about it as well as bringing in some pictures to the mix.

The worst part of it all is the pushing and shoving and the damn people that stand on the left side of the escalator instead of walk. I actually had my first push just the other day and I quickly found the New Yorker inside of me and told the guy off. I have to admit I was a little surprised at myself... but the guy was an ass and deserved to be told off.

Until next time happy commuting. What are your commuting nightmares?

There is no place like home!

I flew in to Salt Lake on Thursday night to surprise my family. I couldn't wait to see the baby... and it was the only weekend I would possibly be able to fly out there until after the US Open. I told my sister, Angie that I was going to be flying in because she was my ride. Angie and Abbey picked me up and we subsequently surprised Heather and her husband, Jason and then my parents. I got the best reaction out of my parents, because well I think they love me the most. I love surprises and had so much fun sneaking in on them.

My best surprise was my beautiful niece Audrey Faye! I love her so much. I can't believe the way it feels to be an Aunt. It is probably one of the best things that has ever happened to me. I couldn't really take my eyes off of her and spent most of my time holding her. I was able to see Heidi and Hiba very briefly-but I was so happy that we were able to meet up before they went to Denver. I was able to sneak in a haircut with my favorite stylist-Christeena. I seriously love the way she cuts my hair and I really miss her. Jason and I had some good laughs and then I popped in on Lexi's bridal shower and then Allison, Tina, Scott and I had dinner on Saturday night, but mostly it was family time.

I know it is hard for some people to understand. But when you live away from home and then you go home for a visit it can be VERY stressful. In my short time period of being home there were SO many people that I wanted to see... and even more people that I didn't get a chance to see. :( It is so hard to spread yourself around-especially when you are exhausted. I am so sad that I didn't get to see Julia and Shannon and Chris, and Deanna and Christian and Nicole and Jason! I also have so many cousins that I didn't get to see. I'm sorry! Already since I've lived in NJ I've been home more than I ever went home when I lived out here the first time.

I get homesick. I get really sad sometimes. While I've made some good friends out here, they don't know me as well as the friends I've had for years. They don't get my jokes, they don't like jokes about trees and they don't laugh when I cheat at pool.

In other news... I am loving my job! It is so much fun and not an hour of my day goes by in which I feel the need to distract myself with Internet surfing-which says A LOT! I've already made some new friends at the company and my team is great! being in HR I've also learned the ins and outs of writing resumes that will get noticed. The best advice I can give you-Write a cover letter! I know you've heard that a million times, but it is really the best way to brag about your skills and convince the person that is hiring to call you. Don't be boring in your cover letter. Be professional but be yourself. I think it is really hard to write a good cover letter. If anyone wants me to look at their resume or cover letter I'd be happy to do so. I don't claim to be an expert, but I'm in the "hiring" side of things and may be able to offer some pointers. Just let me know.

I think that is about it. It is really starting to be so beautiful here. I love the leaves turning green and all the flowers coming out. It is so nice to ride my bike on the way to the train in the morning and watch spring come alive.

Oh one more thing! I've absolutely gone crazy in the beading side of life. I have been making necklaces and bracelets and earrings, and I am having so much fun! So far I've only given them as gifts, but John is really trying to convince me to sell some. I hope to do that at one point, but for now I love them too much to part with them. :)