Clarification....

Good morning loves. So last night's post was kind of a joke. I also can not think of anything worse than being a housewife in the 50's. I love my modern life as a woman. But I will say that there is something to be said for tradition. If men would be more like the gentlemen of old (i.e. Carey Grant) then I'd be happy to make them a pot roast occasionally. haha 

So I've got some interviews set up for tomorrow and I'm going to meet with a woman at Seton Hall who is helping me to get set up there. I'll be starting school at William Patterson in January and then at Seton Hall in September. I kind of think I'm crazy...but here goes nothing. Its so crazy to think that I'm actually going to go to grad school. If you would have told me two years ago that I'd be doing that I would have laughed in your face. But life is funny. I'm really looking forward to a new challenge and lord knows how much I love change. 

Proper care and feeding of husbands

So I've been reading this really great book lately and I really feel like its sinking in. So tonight I'm making a roast beef feast.... I'm doing my hair and dressing in the cutest little thing I can find. I just hope that when my husband gets home from his long hard day I can give him the best massage and melt all of his worries away. 

HAHAHAH ok....so as you know I am not married. But I was thinking about what it would have been like to be a housewife in the 50's. Because today for some reason I sure felt like one. 

something good

So last night Jersey Johnny and I had a long talk. We have known each other for a long time and we have had many different feelings for each other. I'm not sure exactly what was accomplished in the end of our talk, but I felt a lot better. 

Part of me just still wants that sexy black man that used to love me. I guess I'll just get my shit together... and go from there. 

Blustery Day

Good Morning! I had a nice evening at home last night. I cuddled up with the dogs and watched Sleep Hollow. I love Johnny Depp! It was the perfect end to my day to watch this great scary movie. 

Yesterday I decided I was going to go on a little drive. My mistake was that I tried to take a short cut that John showed me. I didn't turn off of it when I was supposed too and I ended up somewhere I didn't plan on being. But eventually I found my way and ended up going to West Point. I didn't see any cute military men.... but I'm sure I can find some later. ehehe 

After driving to West Point I decided that I really wanted to go to the cemetery in Sleepy Hollow to see where Washington Irving was burried. So I drove to Sleep Hollow and went to the cemetery. It was kinda cool because I basically drove right to his grave site without any problems. It was just as creepy as I thought it would be and then I drove by the Headless Horseman Bridge. I am so in love with the little town of Sleepy Hollow. I would actually love to live there. It is right along the Hudson River...but its far enough away from Manhatten that it isn't as gross as it is near the city. 

Still looking for jobs. MJ found me a temp job with her company. I'm going to take it because I need to work.... I am going nuts! 

Hopefully I can get everything going and get hired on for a full time position. Well I'm off to face the rain and wind. 

What a great weekend! made possible by NYC

I had such a great weekend! On Friday night I went in to the city with Emily and Danielle to a fundraiser for Project Whitehouse. Our friend Melissa works for the project and they were having a fundraiser to raise money in order to train women to take on leadership roles, specifically in the government. The function was at Marquis which is right next to Glass (Nicole always used to tell me to go to Glass, but I never made it there before. Now I know where it is! ). There was some free drinks and some free drama. All in all it was a fun night. I have to remember though that alcohol is a little bit stronger here than I'm used too...haha I seem to remember singing "I got 99 problems but a bitch aint one" really loudly. 

Saturday was even more fun! Em and I got up early (despite my massive hang over) and went in to the city with her mom, MJ. They were going to see Wicked and I was going to go to The Met. Well MJ has a friend who is in Wicked and he invited all three of us on a backstage tour. It was so much fun! I thought of Heidi the whole time because I know that she would have enjoyed it as much as I did. We met the whole cast and all the dressers and stage crew. It was so fun to see the behind the scenes. It made me miss my theatre days a little. So after seeing all of that...there was no way that I could leave and go to the Met! So after we found a little man who was able to "hustle" me up a ticket...I was able to see the show. It was AWESOME! I laughed, I cried...it was great. Probably one of my favorite shows. 

Sunday night was also great! As most of you know....I love Sleepy Hollow. I am obsessed with Hudson Valley. I don't know why but it is so magical to me. There is just something about it. I convinced John in to taking me to this Legend of Sleepy Hollow thing they have. When we got there we had to walk down this dimly lit path in to the Legend Festival. It was surrounded by trees and a little pond. When we got to the beginning there was a man dressed in clothing from 1600's. He was telling the story of Ichabod Crane and the Headless Horseman. It was so fun to listen to the story by this big bonfire. After the story we turned the corner and were met by none other than the Headless Horseman! It was sooooo cool. I love this kinda shit. haha Then we walked the rest of the grounds and saw haunted trees and ghost puppets. It was such a good time. I can't wait to go back next year and see even more. 

After we got back to my house John kissed me. On the way to Sleepy Hollow he grabbed my hand in the car and I had to fight back my tears. I know why I cried... and I know why it just didn't seem right that he was kissing me, but I didn't stop him. I don't know if it will feel right to have anyone else kiss me for a while. 

I had a great weekend... but now here I am on a Monday morning trying to make sense of it all. 

Kate Spade

The only conceivable cure I know for a broken heart is....beautiful, red, italian leather. Thank god I have an occasion to wear my new Kate Spade beauties. I love them so much I want to sleep with them. Seriously....I don't need some sexy black man. I have my sexy red shoes. 

Speaking of broken hearts... mine sure is.

Oh What a Day

Ok...so its no secret. I'm in love with Ingrid Michaelson. She just happens to be exactly what I need right now as I'm going through a tough time with my heart. This morning while getting ready I was listening to "Oh What a Day", one line stuck out to me, "Oh what a day is today, nothing can stand in my way. Now that you've shipped out from under my skin, I think I'm ready to win." I'm tired of feeling like I've lost everything. So today...I'm ready to win. 

I applied at a bunch of places yesterday. I actually really want to get a job at Whole Foods. There are many reasons why I think it would be a good job for me. But the major reason is because I will be able to get insurance! So cross your fingers. My parents kept harassing me to get a "real job" because I have my degree. Well its all fine and good to get a real job...accept for the fact that the job I want is to be a diplomat...and I want to go finish Grad school before I even attempt the big nasty test I have to take to become a diplomat. Well yesterday my dad had a break through...on his own. He called and said...oh Jess you know I was thinking....if you were to get a "real job" (i.e. with the state department) you may not be able to focus on school. WOW! Something I've been trying to get them to understand for the past 5 months. Insane. Well I'm glad they finally get it. Now that I'm not dating that sexy black man (still not really ready to write about it)...my parents will probably call and tell me they are sold on the idea. EH! 

In other news.... I am so happy to be back on the east coast. I miss my friends back home so much-but this is where I'm supposed to be. I love everything about being here and so does my skin! Cross your fingers that I can find a job soon though....I'm sooooo bored and I want to meet some new people. 

Also.... I am so horny right now. I think its the weather and probably because I haven't gotten any in a while... but I am looking for some lovin. I'll keep you posted. A quick fling should help me sufficiently flush the memory of the best thing that ever happened to me out of my mind and heart. 

I just want to be OK

Well its been a while since I've had time or access to catch everyone up on my day to day life. The biggest news is that I'm in Jersey! Finally. It was so weird to be back at first, but now it seems so normal. I bought myself a MAC yesterday...and I love it! I've never had one before so it took me a few minutes to get used to it, but I really like it. 

My first business is to find a job. I haven't worked in like 3 weeks...and its really getting old. I know some people would love to have that time to relax, but the past 3 weeks haven't all been fun and games. A lot of things have happened lately...some of which I'm not ready to talk about. Some things have been great. I went to Disneyland with my family before I moved east and that was really nice. Then our economy went to shit and it took almost a week and a half longer to close on my house than I had originally planned on. Luckily though...the house sold and its all closed. It was the weirdest feeling to leave my home and know it was for the last time. I had made some good memories there and in a way I'll miss it. But as I've said before, I knew it was time to leave. 

I've been in to the city a few times since I've been back and its been nice. I can't describe it but it feels like I've come home...kind of. 

Some things that I didn't want to change have changed and I'm dealing with them the best that I can. Someday I'll think about writing about it, but not yet. Its too raw right now and I can't deal with it.